I Am Not I

Four thousand volumes of metaphysics will not teach us what the soul is. ~Voltaire

Life, for me, is remembering that I am a spiritual being inside my physical body. My soul, though invisible and untouchable, is the most solid thing I have to hang on to in this harsh world. It is eternally present...it can't be seen, but it is felt deep down at the molecular level. Its quiet voice always tells me the honest truth, even when I don't want to hear it. It never leaves me, even as life, at times, knocks me to my knees. In the darkest hours, in the most joyful moments, in every moment, it is with me, giving me strength to carry on. It is I. And it's through my soul's eyes that I write my poems - she notices those "simple things" and I capture them with my camera, happy for her company, while she patiently wanders and waits for my words to come.

This is a poem I've been working on for several weeks...I'm linking up today with Kim's Texture Tuesday, and she asks us to talk about what life is to us. For my image, taken in Sperryville, Va last week, I used Kim's "peony" texture at Multiply/20%. Click on the button below to visit her blog and participate.

EDIT: I'm also linking up with Poets United for their weekly Poetry Pantry prompt - click HERE to see more poems and/or share your own!

OCTOBER

Twilight's curtains
draw closed, revealing
their starry fabric.
A hint of heaven hides
on their reverse side
as my gypsy soul wanders,
barefoot and searching,
walking lightly,
feeling deeply,
sifting the moonlight
with her yearning sieve,
gathering up
its gold stars
to jingle as charms
on her bracelet.

She thinks about
the luminance of love,
the opacity of loss,
the nectar of flowers,
the hinges on doors
never opened, and
her soft heart tries
again and again to
penetrate the universe.
My unwritten poems are
inside her, soul-tended
and spinning, as she
notices simple things: the
rusting leaves, the purpling
skies, the rotting and
bruising of October.

© Sherri Brannon 2013

I am not I.
I am this one
Walking beside me whom I do not see,
Whom at times I manage to visit,
And whom at other times I forget;
The one who remains silent when I talk,
The one who forgives, sweet, when I hate,
The one who takes a walk where I am not,
The one who will remain standing when I die. ~Juan Ramón Jiménez

Abandoned Doors

Close some doors. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because they no longer lead somewhere. ~Paulo Coehlo

Isn't it funny how, as humans, we leave some doors open in our lives that really should have been closed a long time ago? They're no longer of any good use to us, but still we keep them open, even as their foundation begins to break down and fall apart. Why do we do that? It's funny (or not) how that works.

Today I'm linking up with Kathy's weekly Song-ography prompt, which is "look out any window". Technically, this photo I took is of a door and I'm not talking about windows at all...oops. But the second line in the song involves a doorway...and it is a portal of some sort, right? It's all I've got this week.

I took this image in Sperryville, VA. We stumbled upon this abandoned building when driving down a random country road. Oh, the stories this place could tell! I'm so fascinated with abandoned buildings - they're filled with such history, but it's all a mystery. And these abandoned places can be kind of creepy, too, if you start letting your imagination run away with you...just saying...lol. I'm always glad to have my big, strong husband with me when we're checking them out!

Thank you for stopping by - if you want to visit Kathy's blog and participate, click HERE.

A Bridal Shower - Crafty Fun

My good friend's daughter is getting married in November, and I helped organize "the crafty side" of her bridal shower which took place last Sunday (my daughter is the maid of honor). I hadn't been crafty in a long time and, I gotta say, it was a lot of fun getting out the glue sticks and scissors again. The theme for the shower was "burlap and lace" - she's having a rustic, country barn wedding. The primary color was pink.

I really appreciated having Pinterest as inspiration for the planning - I got so many fantastic ideas from bridal shower pins. I thought I'd share some of the decorations I created...it was fun planning the decor and all the little, extra details.

The wedding advice jar - this cookie jar has been in the family for generations. I wrapped it with burlap and ribbon, added tissue paper flowers to a chalkboard for the sign, and also cut out heart shapes from scrapbook paper for guests to write advice on the back of.



These were the burlap/tissue paper flowers I created to decorate the tables. I attached them to the sides of the white tablecloths and then connected them with jute string, tied up in a rustic bow.



There were burlap-wrapped jars to hold the utensils...and pretty polka dot napkins.


For favors, there were chocolate chip cookies tucked inside glassene bags, capped with pretty scrapbook paper, and tied with a pink ribbon/thank you tag. There were also pink nail polishes (I didn't get a good photo of those) and tulip bulbs wrapped in tulle and tied with ribbon.





For the banner, we created a sign that said, "He asked - she said yes". I printed the letters out on my printer (click HERE to find the source - many thanks to this blogger), used double-stick tape to attach them to kraft brown cardstock, and attached the letters to jute string with glittery pink clothes pins. This was hung over the "bridal chair" along with some of the many tissue paper pom poms we made. They're so easy to make and look so pretty - there are tutorials everywhere if you do a Google search. My daughter was a huge help in making the poms.



I was thrilled with how these mini donut diamond rings turned out...I saw them on Pinterest and knew I had to find a way to make them. I used unshrunk white shrink plastic as my "gems" - I created a gem template shape, traced the shapes onto the shrink plastic, used a silver permanent Sharpie to draw the gem lines, and then cut them out with scissors. The plastic was sturdy and sharp enough to easily pierce the donuts. They were a big hit, and as you can see, I forgot to take a photo until some of them had already been eaten...excuse the crumbs.


And finally, where would a bridal shower be without balloons? These were placed outside, of course, and you can see the gorgeous blue sky/clouds reflected in the window. It was a beautiful day, with perfect weather...all in all, a very successful day!

Try A Little Tenderness

Being tender and open is beautiful. As a woman, I feel continually shhh’ed. Too sensitive. Too mushy. Too wishy washy. Blah blah. Don’t let someone steal your tenderness. Don’t allow the coldness and fear of others to tarnish your perfectly vulnerable beating heart. Nothing is more powerful than allowing yourself to truly be affected by things. Whether it’s a song, a stranger, a mountain, a rain drop, a tea kettle, an article, a sentence, a footstep, feel it all – look around you. All of this is for you. Take it and have gratitude. Give it and feel love. ~Zooey Deschanel

I was struck by these silky spider webs stretched across our ivy, and how the sunlight made them glow...I instantly ran for my camera. Why is it I see these little things that so many around me don't notice? And why am I so affected by them? I don't have an answer...I only know that I'm grateful to notice these sacred moments and want to capture them on film. It's a gift I'm very happy for. I will never allow this life to steal my tenderness...how about you? Since many of you who read my blog are fellow photographers and/or artists, I have a feeling I'm amidst a very tender tribe with similar thoughts...this makes me smile.

I'm linking up today with Kim Klassen's Texture Tuesday - I used her "Cora" texture at Multiply/25%, and it added just the right richness. Click below to visit her blog and/or participate in the weekly prompt.

A Hint of Autumn

Lord: it is time. The huge summer has gone by.
Now overlap the sundials with your shadows,
and on the meadows let the wind go free.

Command the fruits to swell on tree and vine;

grant them a few more warm transparent days,

urge them on to fulfillment then, and press

the final sweetness into the heavy wine. ~Rainer Maria Rilke

Yesterday, my family and I drove out to the country for the day...Virginia has the most beautiful country roads. We saw some gorgeous sights and it felt almost like fall, except for the extreme heat! We are definitely experiencing an Indian summer here this first week of October, with temps in the high 80's. Despite the heat, we still felt the fall spirit and found a lovely apple cider stand...we stocked up on pumpkin butter, apple butter, local honey, and fresh cider. We ate lunch at a sweet little restaurant in Sperryville and slowly meandered our way back home. It was a great day, and here are a few shots I captured. I'll probably share some more soon because I got quite a few! We're definitely making several trips to the mountains this month to capture the fall foliage with our cameras. This is why I love the month of October!

I'm linking up today with Kathy's weekly Song-Ography prompt, which is "forever autumn". Click HERE to visit her blog and participate! Thanks so much for stopping by.

Peace

In the back’s low hollow sometimes

a weightless hand guides me, gentle pressure

so I tack soft as a sailboat. (Go there)
Soften the space between your eyes (smudge

of eucalyptus), the third eye

opens. There’s the wide vermillion sky
that cradled us before birth,

and the sun pours its golden sap

to preserve me like His precious insect. ~Mary Karr, "Meditatio"

Thank you again to everyone who responded to my recent posts about the loss of Ruby, our corgi. I was truly touched by your words of support, and it helped me so much. I mean that from the heart.

Today I'm happy to participate in Bonnie's monthly photo art prompt. This month's theme is "sky". I chose a photo from our Hilton Head trip this past summer because I got so many incredible sky photos during that week. This is an image of my daughter staring off at the sunset - I used Bonnie's "heavenly" texture at Multiply/63%. I also used the cutout effect in PSE to give it a more contemporary feel. There were multiple passes through Radlab, and then I added the text at the end. I think this image is a perfect representation of "peace", at least for me, anyway. As I've mentioned many times on this blog, I never feel more at peace than I do while walking beside the ocean.

Thank you for visiting, and you can click on the button below if you'd like to visit Bonnie's Pixel Dust Photo Art site. It's worth a visit!

Original photo:

The Grace of a Dog

Un-winged and naked, sorrow surrenders its crown to a throne called grace. ~Aberjhani

On this Friday, I find that coming downstairs in the mornings and not seeing Ruby waiting for me is heart crushing. I find that every time I eat a meal, I'm still setting two tiny bites aside on my plate in honor of Ruby (I realized later that my daughter is doing the same). I find that a very simple routine, fixing a salad, is almost unbearable because it was Ruby's favorite thing and she would sit at my feet waiting for her crouton. I find going to the bank very hard because it's directly next door to the vet where we said goodbye. I find that grief makes your heart ache just as intensely whether it's a human being or a precious dog.

But do you know what else? I find that, despite the tears and pain of not having my Ruby here, I also feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude. It's with me every moment of the day and it brings me such comfort. I feel so incredibly blessed and grateful that we got to have this beautiful angel in our lives. She was the best gift our family has ever been given. Between the tears of grief, we feel that gratefulness just as strongly. And our days are also filled with endless memories that make us smile and laugh...she gave us so many moments we will treasure forever.

We will get through this...but these first days are hard. We leave her water bowl out, we place her toys and pictures beside our computers and night stands, we leave the Ruby dust bunnies in the corners, and we take it one day at a time. I will try my best to handle my grief with as much grace as my sweet Ruby handled the last days of her life.

I promise there won't be endlessly sad blog posts in the coming weeks...these words today just felt right.